Ace of Wands

5.9.2020

Ace of Wands

Meaning:

  • Ace of wand represents new beginning, but the wand is also the initiator
  • Represents a dynamic and driving energy force
    • Note the fire blazing from the ornate wand, suspended in the sky. A pair of male hands appear to nurture the wand, going towards the flame
  • Represents the beginning of action and taking initiative, being creative in business
  • Represents the birth of new ideas and inspirations
  • Can represent the seed of “new life”
  • Symbolizes the seeds of an idea you feel very excited about (frequently career or business related)
  • This card appears a the start of a new job or the start of a new business venture
  • This card carries a lot of creative energy (good luck for anyone in creative endeavors)
  • The Ace of Wands represents a high degree of energy and action
  • It holds a force of strength, enthusiasm and excitement
  • Any projects started during the time of receipt of this card hold good promise for the future
  • It may also represent an entirely new way of life, with anticipation and excitement  for the transition
  • If the Ace of Wands is accompanied by the Empress, it almost always means news of a pregnancy or birth (literal creation of new life)
  • The Ace of Wands is a male active energy associated with procreation (seed of life)
  • If a new relationship is starting, when receiving the Ace of Wands it will be a very passionate relationship

Personal Experience: I believe I have been getting this card pulled up in a lot of my May Tarot readings for 2020. This is relevant because through my spiritual journey, I am moving to a new location, starting a new creative project and starting a new job. 

Other Experience: I am reminded of certain people and their drive towards career on a journey to find their own inner peace.

Are You Reading My Story?

My Tarot Journal:

Started on 5.9.2020

Day #1, I started reading “Easy Tarot Handbook” by Josephine Ellershaw. Started to learn how to shuffle the deck. I also placed a quartz crystal on the deck while I’m reading the book because I have only seen a few of the cards and with little detail as they feel during shuffle. 

I have been advised to wrap the deck up in a handkerchief, as well as with the quartz crystal to protect the Tarot and its energies. It is meant to lay underneath the pillow the first night and maybe an additional night to align with my own energies.

I will be interested to see if this my “automatic writing,” that my grandmother, my angel once shared with me. Thank you, grandma.

How this will work is I will select each Tarot card and hold it in my hand while reading the meaning outloud to retain more information. I will notate the meaning of each card as it’s presented to me. I’m doing this, not as recommended, but how I feel it is meant to be done for me.  I will also provide the meaning here, as to retain the information further for myself.

I personally feel I may already be more advanced when begging Tarot because I have already been researching the other sciences through my own awakening to find my life’s purpose. I am also aware of  my own “magic,” I, however, up until this point have yet to discover what it is.

Lastly, while reading this book I am listening to some binaural beats to raise my vibration, as from added guidance from spirit. Thank you spirit for your guidance. When I start reading each card’s meaning I will switch to a different frequency for intelligence and frequency. 

Date

Card                     Card Meaning: with bullet points, Personal Experiences: Document anything that you are personally reminded of when reading the meaning. Other Experiences: List others experiences if coming during learning each card. Also document dreams during this time.Record intuition moments from dreams and while awake and through meditation.Then analyze the information and learn from the information.

Minor Arcana

Wands = Red = Fire

Cups = Gold = Water

(Water is colorless and therefore reflects the container)

Swords = Blue = Air

Pentacles = Green = Earth

  • All Aces represent new beginnings

Wands: Represent the element of fire. It is the spark of creativity that inspires us to take action. They stand for self expression through enterprise. They frequently refer to work and business. Fires is an active, male energy.

Research

5.11.20

Journey to Enlightenment Day #1

https://members.astrologyanswers.com/courses/enlightenment_program/module1.php

Module 1:

I am not saying I know myself, at all. I am asking for assistance, HELP, guidance, in the process, whatever and however that may be. Thank you, for showing me the light, on this journey.

Exercise #1 5.19.2020

5= Bliss

1= Awful

Life Aspect Worksheet-Relationships

Love Life Rating: 3

How do you feel about the romantic relationships in your life? 3

Are they passionate and exciting? 2

Do you feel that you and your partner(s) really connect? 4

Do your relationships last for a considerable amount of time? 3

Are your relationships balanced and loving? 3

Personal Relationships (Family and Friends) Rating: 1.6

Are you supportive and involved in these relationships? 2

Do you have close ties with your family? 1

Do you make it a point to spend time with family and friends on a regular basis? 1

Do you feel you get the support you need from this “inner circle” of yours? 2

Do you have people you trust enough to confide in? 2

Professional Relationships (Colleagues and Bosses)Rating: .8

Do you feel appreciated and valued in your workplace? 2

Do you have professional relationships that you value and trust? 1

Do you have a mentor at work? 1

Total=5.4

Life Aspect Worksheet-Career

Rating: 1.38

Are you happy in the industry you work in? 3

Do you feel challenged and fulfilled with the kind of work you do? 1

Does this career path play to your strengths? 3

Does your career offer room for growth or advancement? 1

Do you feel your talents are being used to their fullest extent? 1

Do you enjoy going to work everyday? 1

Is your job within a reasonable distance to your home? 1

Is this the career you dreamed about when you were young? 1

Did you purposely choose this career? 3

Are you as happy with your job as you were when you started? 1

Do you feel your boss and co-workers appreciate the job you do? 1

Do you feel that you’re a valued member of the team? 1

If you could do any job in the world, would this be it? 1

Total/13= Rating: 18

Life Aspect Worksheet-Finances

Rating: 2.28

Do your finances allow you to live a comfortable lifestyle? 2

Do you feel you make enough money to meet your needs? 1

Do you stress about money on a regular basis? 2

Do you ever argue over money with loved ones? 1

Do you pay your bills on time? 1

Are you able to save money every month? 1

Do you take an active role in budgeting and managing your finances? 1

Do you understand the various investment tools and programs available to you? 2

Do you ever read books about money, investing or financial well-being? 1

Do you often wish you made more money than you do? 4

Do you have dreams that would require you to make more money? 5

Is money ever an obstacle to you getting what you want in life? 5

Is your cash kept neat and flat in your purse or wallet? 5

Do you always know how much money you have at any given time? 1

Total/14=Rating: 32

Life Aspect Worksheet-Spirituality

Rating: 3.14

Do you feel content with your belief system? 3

Do you feel connected to a Higher Power? 2

Does your belief system allow you to explore new ideas and concepts? 5

Do you regularly practice your spirituality or religion? 4

Do you feel that your belief system is accepted by your family and friends? 1

Do you feel firm in your belief system, without unanswered questions or doubts? 2

Does your belief system sync with your personal values and practices? 5

Total/7=Rating: 22

Life Aspect Worksheet-Personal Growth and Development

Rating: 2.46

Do you feel that you’ve grown and matured over the last five to ten years? 1

Do you regularly participate in personal development exercises? 4

Do you regularly explore new beliefs and ideas? 4

Are you open to incorporating those new ideas into your own belief system? 5

Do you have a support circle that you can discuss your thoughts and ideas with? 1

Are you excited about what the future holds? 2

Do you feel you’ve learned valuable lessons from past experiences? 3

Do you live consciously and with purpose? 1

Do your daily activities mesh with your personal goals? 3

Do you journal on a regular basis? 3

Do you meditate on a regular basis? 3

Do you like who you’ve become so far? 1

Do you have a clear picture and plan for the future? 1
Total/13=Rating: 32

Life Lessons

“I think I’m the true lover/friend unconditional love teacher for everyone. The belief, in a fairy-tale love, and I show to people their worth. That “Prince Charming,” whomever, that may be to them, is a possibility, and not that of the “fairy-tale,” itself.”

I said this yesterday and it was such an eye opening experience for my own soul. A peace.

Now, it is early morning, the following day and I am outside enjoying the morning with the singing birds. I look down. Another life lesson, not to be ignored.

Even mother nature, is using a seed to represent a sword. Telling me, “Keep fighting.”

Be kind and have an amazing day!

Cadence

Needed for dramatic and intentional effect

If I am sharing a song or video with you it is because it is meant to be watched for the full effect of my thoughts.
Conditioning is practice. Practice is bringing into fruition what you intend to be. A cadence is practice. A cadence is conditioning. The cadence you hear above I mentioned, in one of my previous posts and the word, “kill.” Even as I write this, I feel the same type of ick and the need to cleanse. I wonder who is watching and listening, waiting to change the status of my discharge. A guilt that I am doing something wrong by admitting this fucked me up.
As a military police officer, during boot camp and AIT for whatever reason we were held to a different standard than any other professions in the ARMY. Boot Camp for MP’s is 6 weeks and then 11 weeks of AIT. Essentially, your training for your job. The college of the ARMY. The cadences were the only music I experienced during this time. As I stated, yesterday my emotion for music is “beauty.” Beauty became represented by the one word, “kill.” If you get only one lesson from this read let it be that last sentence. Read it again. Sit on it. Take a breath.
I do not do well with being told what to do, EVER! I have never dealt with authority well. That is alright, I giggled too as I wrote it. I got “capped, ” a lot while in the military because of this trait that I possess. (Military Definition-Capped: Punished, made to do extra-mundane activities meant to teach a lesson to not defy authority.) 🙂 Activities, such as filling (25) 5-gallon water jugs and loading them into a truck to go to the range, in the morning at 3am. Then you are told to unload all 25 back off the truck and dump all the water you spent the last hour filling. You just finish and your, your unit is lining up for a 4am PT formation. That was my punishment for singing while in the line waiting for my eggs, as I heard Timbaland’s The Way I Are playing over the loud speaker. The only music I heard in weeks.
There was not a lot of coping options to assist me with so much of who I was not, as a human being. Sundays were the only day I had. Sundays were the days I spent hours, in line, hoping I had enough minutes to have a 10-15-minute conversation with the ones I loved and missed the most. Having to decide, each day who be the lucky one, I got to hear comfort me. The others having to wait weeks for a response from me. A response, the US ARMY got to see before I did. They saw the emotions, meant for you, before you did. The calls listened to; every word shared with a stranger. Every word I wrote read before anyone of us got to feel.
Through all of this, Sundays also became special to me for a different reason. I found something to bring me back to the beauty I felt I was lacking through the entire experience. I don’t talk about this portion, often, out of fear that if I do that it will take away from the good I found, in a very dark time.
I am going back to my roots, for a moment. My mother raised me, in the Baptist Church. I do not focus on this aspect of me because it does not define me, but it was a lesson I was reminded of. Sundays became a memory and a way to cope, in unison. A feeling I am reminded of frequently as I go through isolation, currently.
Every Sunday, after cleaning my weapon, rolling my socks and tucking the corners of the military issued cotton blanket providing the only warmth for my soul, at night. I lined up, in a small formation of 5 people at noon, on Sundays. Just like that we were off. Left…. Left…. Left, Right, Left…What is the color of blood?…Red…Red…Red,,, What do we do…Kill…Kill…Kill…Left…Left…Left, Right, Left…

My destination, a pew, at the back of an African-American Baptist Church.

My roots, my faith, music and beauty, in one location. My cleanse, my confession, at the end of a week of practicing, “killing.” Every service, ending with communion and the song “Oh Happy Day,” projecting through the rafters of a church I had no tie to. I would hear the last note, stand-up, about face and once again, Left… Left… Left, Right, Left…

That one moment, for only an hour, I was 11 again. Watching the following scene, on repeat and I had nothing else.

Holy fuck! What did we do without High-Def? For those that don’t wear glasses, that’s what it looks like when you need to. Just in case you didn’t know. 🙂

I was back in the church. I was back with my mom. I had faith, if only for an hour. A moment of realization that we do have soundtracks to our lives. For only an hour a week, learning the lesson that you cannot run away from life because the grass is not always greener, on the other side. You cannot run away from the ones you love. An hour of keeping the faith, in a time where a birthday card sent from your sister on your birthday mocking your commander in chief and just that alone getting you thrown in jail by military law and now look at the man he developed into after I had such a strong distaste for who he once was, but I left to fight for him. We do not change; we develop into who we are meant to be. We fix that of what we do not left on our souls. It was a time where, I signed “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell,” swearing under oath and to God that my sexual preference was not geared towards females. I would wonder, if I would turn around and arrest me, after one night of listening to my calls or reading my mail.
So, when asked why I have a female’s name tattooed, on my neck, that is because I was not the only one going through the mentioned above when I was. There are always multiple sides to someone’s story. These are not excusing for my behaviors or wrongs, but explains to someone’s questions, over the years and not able to be vulnerable enough to be honest. The reason because she asked me to. A symbol.

Some tattoo semi-colon’s for suicide awareness and some a puzzle piece for Autism. I did a name, as a reminder of everyone else involved, in your own internal PTSD’s. The real victims. They need recognized too. That is why you still see the name and it is not covered up, as if it did not happen.

My tattoos became my story. They became my scars. They become my art and they became my beauty. When looking at my reflection, I no longer see the ink representing my own beauty. They are not seen because they have become a part of me. They are a part of my skin. They are my strength.

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